Can I keep it too real for a minute? Obviously, that’s a rhetorical question. If you go back to one of the very first posts I made, I promised to try and be as honest as possible when it came to my new life as a parent. Remember? Oh…ok Well I just re-posted it last week, so it should be easy to find!
Anyway, let me be honest with you all. Life is H….A….R….D, and that’s me being completely honest. Work life, wife life, child life, friend life, associate life, it’s all hard. But, does it have to be? I can’t give you an honest answer on that. I can only give you my thoughts. So….here they are.
If you hate your job, that’ll translate into hating your wife, which in turn leads to hating your child, then envying friends, etc.… Is that too brutal? I don’t feel like it is. Every day that we wake up, we MUST make a decision how to spend our energy. Our energy is like water, it affects anything it touches once spilled. How do you prevent your water turning into mud you ask? Keep it YOU! But Miles, what does that mean? It simply means, find something that keeps you reminded of who you were when you were at your happiest. That could be keeping constant contact with a friend that you knew would 100% make you laugh just because of the memories you shared. This could be taking an hour or two just driving around in your car listening to songs that reminded you of unforgettable times. If you’re a foodie or a movie buff, explore a restaurant or movie alone (if you want to). Do you like working on cars? Are you a great window shopper? What is it that you just couldn’t wait to do. I’m sure it wasn’t waking up to go and work for someone else (I could be wrong)? I just want you to do the thing that brought the most positive energy to your life.
Why you ask? Well, to be completely honest Its because of this. Depression is something that is often overlooked. I battle with it almost daily, and I have NOTHING to be depressed about. My wife and I argue, we talk about finances, how Parker should be raised, who we want around her, which parent she thinks is cooler. You know, regular new parents stuff. But, don’t for one second think that she’s the cause of any of my internal issues. They came WAYYYYY before she decided to join this ride. I have a great wife, a child who shows me unconditional love in the weirdest way, a work family that is completely awesome, friends who I have QUALITY relationships with, and a family that I never question their love; and that’s from both sides, my family and my in-laws (even though I don’t really like the word in-laws). I have everything I need to be happy, and I mean happy 24-7-365..However, when life happens everyday, it’s easy to forget about how much you have going for you. Stress is inevitable and there’s only 24 hours in a day. We can’t be happy all the time. We’d be lying to ourselves, and that’s not keeping it real.
So, for me I’ve found something that makes me happy OUTSIDE of my family. I found a new love for working out. Maybe not so much of the pushing heavy weight, and yelling during my set, but there’s a peace that comes over me when I’m just there, doing my thing and listening to my music. Obviously, the benefits of losing weight, and toning up are just the after effects, but…ya know, I’ll take it! I’ve left the gym feeling like whatever stress I was dealing with is gone. Whatever disagreement my wife and I had earlier on, no longer is lingering, Parker yelling all night wasn’t so bad after all. For me, it’s a way to reset the clock. I’ve also found that if this renews my mind, then my energy has a hard time going from positive to negative, the “water” that spills over on people is like the calm touch you get when dipping your toe in the ocean (did you just feel hella relaxed right there?) I’ve found a way to keep it ME.
There’s no sense in faking your way through the day. It’s painful, it’s exhausting, it’s just NOT FUN. I’ve tried it, and probably ended the way worse than when I started.
NOW, I didn’t say it’s easy to keep it YOU. I just said it’s something that MUST be done if you want your time filled with as much positive as possible. There’s enough negative already hitting us a million different ways, and a lot of it we can’t control, but we do control US.
With that, I implore you all to go out, or look within to find that time you were at your happiest. What were you doing? Who were you with? Why did you feel so good? You can recapture those feelings. Maybe not doing the EXACT same thing, but it all should bring you back to a time where you felt like YOU 100%. When life was just happy surprise after happy surprise.